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When the Bough Breaks When the Bough Breaks
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Dad Doesn’t Uphold Compulsory Kinship Dad Doesn’t Uphold Compulsory Kinship
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Cut You Out, but Let You Back In Cut You Out, but Let You Back In
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Conclusion: Out of the Family? Conclusion: Out of the Family?
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Cite
Abstract
Chapter 9 discusses the very few individuals in the sample who cut a parent out—something almost always done temporarily. Cutting parents out is possible, but the pull of compulsory kinship is extremely strong in curtailing lifelong estrangement. It is through the rejection of compulsory kinship – even temporarily—that we can see the true strength of it. The people interviewed for this book recognize the severity of cutting off their parents but do so when the relationship reaches a point where they can no longer reframe positive experiences as more salient than negative ones. Estrangement was far more common with dads than moms because many dads already have a precarious relationship with their children due to the structure of parenting and the norms of masculinity that disconnect men from emotional closeness with their children in the United States today.
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